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This Baby did Something Naughty at the Grocery Store
I was living in Harlem at the time on 147th Street between Frederick Douglas Boulevard and Adam Clayton Powell Jr Boulevard. I took about a three and a half minute walk to the Pathmark on 145th Street. Out front, there is a street meat vendor that I gave hundreds of dollars to. Lamb over rice with hot sauce. Damn! Just damn.
I was most likely at the grocery store to buy ice cream, smarties, milk, and cookies. I purchased some other things too, but those were in the basket for sure. Maybe some powdered sugar. I didn’t get my m&m’s and skittles here, just so you know, I got my m&m’s and skittles at the Duane Reade up the hill a bit.
So I’m standing in line waiting to check out and I notice this baby hopping around inside the cart in front of me, you know, just kind of being a baby. His mom wasn’t really paying that much attention and I was pretty amused with him. I think he was trying to show off for me just a little. He just kept smiling at me and I kept smiling back.
That is when he reached out of the cart, grabbed some Flamin’ Hot Cheetos, and tucked them inside his onesie. He did this quickly and with plenty of grace. If I had turned away for just a couple of seconds I would have missed it. I was very impressed. I didn’t even say anything to anyone. Good job baby!
This is one of my top one hundred grocery store memories. If I try to think about it right now, I can picture it perfectly. It is burned in my memory. As soon as I got home I quickly took out a piece of paper and drew the baby.
The result is what you see at the beginning of this article. I couldn’t get the mustache right, but this is exactly what he looked like.
